Communication in the family

 

As we talked about conflict in the family last week and how sometimes this can help families be more united, find a common ground and become more united. There are some that are unable to rise from bad circumstances and become even more broken. I believe some families are unable to deal with conflict because we have not learned how to do so. This can also affect the way we are with other and the way we deal with confrontation. This can be useful even when we are having a discussion with our boss, having a confrontation with a friend, etc. Learning how to deal with these situations in an effective day will help us a lot and help us resolve problems as well.

I am not a very confrontational person and this has caused problems because I have never learned how to deal with conflict and how to respond to it either. I remember I have always rather escape from the situation and not deal with it than actually try to solve it. I believe this might have been because either of my parents haven´t been very good at dealing with confrontation. Whenever they had an argument, let just say that they were not very good at dealing with it, they would probably get really angry with each other and not speak. In a way I guess this behavior got engrained in my head and that is how I learnt how to deal with problems. I remember whenever I would get angry with my brother I would just avoid the situation because I did not know what else to do. This is something very common, none of my friends are good at dealing with conflict. In fact, my best friend says that she has the worst time dealing with her family whenever they start arguing with her.

As years went by I have learned how to better deal with conflict and instead of running away from it, I embrace it. As I have mentioned in previous posts I am basically the mediator in family, I’m the peace keeper. I make sure that everyone treats each other the right way, and whenever there are arguments I´m the one who helps each family member deal with the conflict. I think this change came one day when I was thinking of Jesus Christ. I remembered how he is understanding of us and our trials, how kind and loving he is. That day I decided to become more Christ-like, especially when dealing with conflict. Then later that day my mother came into the room and we had a small conflict, one of the usual ones. Instead of being mad and arguing with her, I decided to see the situation through the Lord´s eyes. That day I used one of the method who are best in dealing with conflict. These methods are essential for a good communication. One vey effective way is empathy, trying to understand what the other person is feeling and why would they feel that way. This can help us better understand their actions and find a common ground when dealing with conflict in a peaceful way. One other important method is inquiry. Asking in a gentle way to the other person to understand more about what is going inside their heads. This can help us also empathize with them. It can also be useful in conflict since most people get very heated in an argument and this situations become more difficult to deal with. By using these techniques we are able to put calm to the situation.

All these methods can help our families and future situations that affect our daily lives.